Skin City: Pool Season Returns to Las Vegas

"A girl in a bikini is like a loaded pistol on your coffee table. There's nothing wrong with it, but it's hard to stop thinking about it." - Garrison Keillor

April 10, 2008

By Leah Bailly
Bodog Nation Contributing Writer

Smell that silicone in the air? That burn of peroxide on your scalp? Done your hundred daily crunches, waxed your unmentionables and picked out that perfect rhinestone thong? Every girl in Vegas can sense the inevitable approaching: pool season. The tanning beds are booked solid. Bikini boot camp classes are packed. Even the cabana boys are pumping their pecs, anticipating their busiest social schedule of the year.

Party people in Vegas take summer very seriously; only the strongest survive until fall. From the decadent "opium beds" at the Moorea Beach Club to $1 margaritas at the Tropicana, pool parties are about booze, babes and beats. Without fail, locals and tourists flock to such massively publicized events as Rehab or indulge in the new "Euro style" topless pool clubs like Bare. So, with all the sun dripping debauchery Sin City has planned for 2008, could this be the best pool season yet?

Get Dirty!

Rehab at the Hard Rock is infamous for being a wet and wild excuse for debauchery.

Most talked about every spring is the infamous Rehab, opening for the season on April 27 at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. The original Vegas pool party is the biggest summer ticket in town, boasting hour-long lineups, bootylicious bodies and huge acts on their outdoor stage. The 40 thatched cabanas are reserved months in advance, despite the $300 booking fees and $1,000 bar tabs. Bottle service hovers around $400 per, while those plastic bottle mojitos roll in around $18 each. Bikini babes can bet huge at swim-up Blackjack tables or just look bodacious for the paparazzi milling about. For 21 consecutive summer Sundays, Rehab is bumping with over 1,000 gyrating girls thigh deep in a lagoon, whilst boardshort-wearing boys parade between them to the DJ's throbbing beats.

Sound like heaven? Or a breeding ground for STDs? The television producers thought so. In their fifth season, the folks at Rehab are taking the party to the next level: reality TV. This year, the Hard Rock will play host to film crews, documenting their "semi-scripted" account of what goes down each Rehab Sunday. Patrons and staff will be performing for cameras amidst the down and dirty pool party action, encouraging the girls gone wild and high rollers to be on their baddest behavior. Feel like getting famous the new-fashioned way? Rehab is still casting.

Go Euro!

This season, most popular of Skin City's bikini trends is, unsurprisingly, going bikiniless. Labeled "European-style sunbathing" by squeamish American promoters, several poolside clubs are advertising the new "bottoms only" style for both men and women. Most provocative of these 21-and-older clubs is Bare at the Mirage, featuring two pools, iced towels and pitcher service (the poolside variation on bottle service) with premixed mojitos and daiquiris for topless loungers. Open Thursdays – Mondays, Bare (managed by the Light Group) hosts a rotation of DJs, allowing the afternoon to ease into the evening in a patio party setting.

Feel like lounging at a topless pool that's a little more laidback? Check out Venus Pool at Caesars Palace.

Vegas' first topless pool-lounge was none other than the Venus Pool at Caesars Palace, a seldom advertised adult venue catering to the deluxe treatment of guests. The Venus is the alternative to the rowdy younger crowd and instead focuses on discreet tanning, mellow music and chiseled pool boys offering free mist. Want to feel like a goddess? Enjoy frozen grapes and long glasses of sangria from your poolside chaise lounge. Luscious and sophisticated, the Venus comes with a princely price tag, from $600 cabanas to premium liquor prices.

Go For Gold!

In true Vegas fashion, luxury cannot be overdone at the pool season's classiest (Euro-style) spot, Tao Beach. Perched atop the Tao nightclub at the Venetian, poolside Tao offers cabanas with plasma TVs, custom bars and personal "misters" and "tanning butlers" (don't ask). The poolside menu features celebrity chef Wolfgang Puck's many crafted delicacies and only high-class booze is available. This more intimate pool party stays open late each week for the decadent Sunset Sundays, complete with floating lanterns and a 15-foot column of fire.  

Can't afford that kind of service? Gold diggers unite! The best place to hook a man must be wasted and bikini clad with nothing to hide. The trashiest pool party in Vegas is the weekly Ditch Fridays at the super slutty, 20-something resort, the Palms. Ditch Fridays launches their 2008 season on May 2 when their three sparkling pools are filled with Vegas' young and restless. Feel like skipping school? Playing hooky one sunny Friday? This is your splash spot. With a 2,500 capacity at a time, this locale is free for local ladies. Boys pay!

Go Big or Go Home!

Mandalay Beach has it all.

Of course, undeniable in Vegas is the largest water park/ pool complex on the Strip, the Mandalay Beach, featuring 11 acres of watery attractions, including a "lazy river" and giant wave pool. Adults enjoy the Moorea Beach Club, where "Euro bathing" is permitted, and cabanas reach an astounding $2,000 a day in prime time. This year, the Mandalay Bay has added a three story glass-fronted casino, featuring Baccarat dealers in bathing suits and high-rolling VIP tables with excellent pool views. The Mandalay Beach also showcases those classic '80s cover bands on their massive stage, blasting the classic synth-ballads you love to hate.

So, still feeling chilled in that post-winter pudge? Ready to shed those layers and dive into summer the Sin City way? This pool season, be sure to choose the pool party that suits your style. Dig the grinding girl-on-girl make-out scene? Fancy a pool boy feeding you grapes in your private cabana? A poolside massage on your very own "opium bed"? Want to drop a cool $5,000 on drinks for a bunch of strippers while being filmed for a reality TV show? Vegas has something for everyone. So bust out that thong and get waxing, because pool season is upon us.

TOP PHOTO: Pool season in Las Vegas is back!